Not sure how to proceed. Any ideas?

RelationshipForums.com Forums Single & Dating Not sure how to proceed. Any ideas?

This topic contains 1 reply, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  socaughtup 5 years, 9 months ago.

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  • #6599

    Flight Recorder
    Participant

    So I’m going to cut to the chase here. But first, some background on my situation.

    So I have known this girl for the past like 6 years (went to highschool with her, ran into her a couple times afterwards) and we started seeing each other 3 months or so ago. We made it ‘facebook official’ about 3 weeks after that. Things were going good the few times I got to see her. She was in school and got pretty busy with it, and I only ever got to see her like once every week and a half. It was pretty stressful for me seeing as I would try and make plans only to have her busy with school or something and have to bail on me. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t blame her for going to school, I’m actually glad that I wasn’t pulling her away from it (I would not feel good about that). It’s just that I was getting mixed signals from her as to what she thought about me. Then one day I texted her asking what she thought about our situation. We ended up mutually breaking up due to the fact that she did have a busy schedule, too busy to have much of a relationship with. This happened about a month ago now

    Now here is the thing. I COMPLETELY regret that. I can’t get her out of my head, nor do I want to. I really want to see her again (in more than a friend way) but I more than anything want her to want me.

    I want her to know that I want her, and that when her schedule opens up again, that I want to go out with her again. Even if her next school semester gets crammed again. Because what I think happened is that because her schedule was crammed so early in the relationship, it wasn’t really right. I mean, thats the time when couples want to see each other as much as possible, not be stuck with school and stuff. And if we started dating again and her schedule filled up again, presumably in line with exams, then it would be easier to deal with due to the fact that we know each other better.

    Now I know, think I should say, that she still likes me back. When we broke up she did say so, and it didn’t feel like it was a stressful episode (I know I did it via text was bad, it just kinda happened). And (I know this is make you laugh) I started playing one of those facebook games just after we broke up because she plays it as well, just to keep some kind of contact with her.

    I know it probably sounds off, but I’m taking the fact that she hasn’t deleted me off of facebook, or even that facebook game, as a sign that she isn’t done with me. I hope to god that she isn’t. She is an awesome person, whom I just can’t stop thinking about.

    So I think I’m going to wait until mid-way through next week, or until I see a ‘finished my exams’ post from her on Facebook, and send her a text. Maybe see if she is up to getting a coffee or something. That way I can tell her what is on my mind. Maybe get some sort of perspective on where we both stand.

    I kinda have this nagging feeling that she is in somewhat the same boat as me (now that I said it out loud though, it isn’t going to happen).

    That is about all I have right now. If any of you actually read through this whole thing I’ll be very thankful (not to mentioned surprised lol).

    P.s. there has never really been scheduling issues on my part. I have always had a flexible work schedule.

    #48550

    socaughtup
    Participant

    Well this may not help but I am the girl in this situation. I have alot going on and a guy that I can’t get out of my head. He is also the one that doesn’t want to continue things bc the scheduling is so bad. If I could quit school to be with him more I would but obviously I can’t. I can only wish that he would put up with all my mess. Now if you think she is still into you, you need to make sure that she knows you are willing to put up with her school stuff. But be very careful here because you need to keep your eyes and ears open for any sort of doubt. Once she has doubt then youre ruined. If she is at a university then there are so many other people there that can easily sweep her off her feet so don’t be so naive to think that it can’t happen. Just be there for here and if anything help her study for all her tests and stuff. I dated a guy once that helped me study and that meant so much to me! I got to get my school stuff done AND I got to hang out with him!? Now that’s lucky so try and mention that to her. Hopefully this helps.
    Now if you read this, seeing as we are in the same situation but on opposite sides. How do I keep him coming back? I know he’s fantastic and worth working around schedules for. How do I show him that I’m worth it too?

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