My boyfriend and I have been dating for 4 months and we still have not had . I’m 23 and he’s in his early 30’s. I spend the night at his house 2-3 times every week. There was a time when I thought of every possibility for why this might be happening: lack of attraction, being hung up on an ex, dating someone else, married, etc. These thoughts infected my every day thoughts. As awkward as it was, I talked to my boyfriend about it a month ago and his reason was that he was deeply hurt by his ex girlfriend and it is taking him more time to be emotionally connected with me. I can understand and respect that he does not want to get hurt again (who does). He said that he thinks it will get better soon and that he does not want to lose me. I want to be with him and care about him but because we do not have (or do anything ual) it makes me emotionally distant. I have not pressured him for since but nothing has improved. I know that he is not ready, but I have woken up to him masturbating and it hurts my feelings that he doesn’t want to have with me. Four months is not a long time and some may say that is not that important, but it is to me. makes me feel fully open and connected, and makes me feel wanted. I don’t want to leave him because of this but are there any other women who are in this predicament? If so, how can I get him to open up or is it just something that he will decide?